"That, sir?" and then he read thus, "In prinspo duse creevit kalelum et
terrum intra sex dyes--primmo dye fe-fe-sit looseum," etc.
"That will do, Mr. Rapid--"
"Ah! ha! I told you so."
"Yes, yes--but translate."
"Translate!" (eyebrows elevating.)
"Yes, translate, render it."
"Render it!! how's that?" (forehead more wrinkled.)
"Why, yes, render it into English--give me the meaning of it."
"MEANING!!" (staring full in my face, his eyes like saucers, and
forehead wrinkled with the furrows of eighty)--"MEANING!! I didn't know
it _had_ any meaning. I thought it was a DEAD language!!"
* * * * *
Well, reader, I am glad you are _not_ laughing at Mr. Rapid; for how
should anything _dead_ speak out so as to be understood? And indeed,
does not his definition suit the vexed feelings of some young gentlemen
attempting to read Latin without any interlinear translation? and who
inwardly, cursing both book and teacher, blast their souls "if they can
make any sense out of it." The ancients may yet speak in their own
languages to a few; but to most who boast the honor of their
acquaintance, they are certainly dead in the sense of Solomon Rapid.
LITTLE ORPHANT ANNIE
BY JAMES WHITCOMB RILEY
Little Orphant Annie's come to our house to stay,
An' wash the cups and saucers up, an' brush the crumbs away,
An' shoo the chickens off the porch, an' dust the hearth, an' sweep,
An' make the fire, an' bake the bread, an' earn her board-an'-keep;
An' all us other childern, when the supper things is done,
We set around the kitchen fire an' has the mostest fun
A-list'nin' to the witch-tales 'at Annie tells about,
An' the Gobble-uns 'at gits you
Ef you
Don't
Watch
Out!
Onc't there was a little boy wouldn't say his pray'rs--
An' when he went to bed at night, away up stairs,
His mammy heerd him holler, an' his daddy heerd him bawl,
An' when they turn't the kivvers down, he wasn't there at all!
An' they seeked him in the rafter-room, an' cubby-hole, an' press,
An' seeked him up the chimbly-flue, an' ever'wheres, I guess;
But all they ever found was thist his pants an' roundabout!
An' the Gobble-uns'll git you
Ef you
Don't
Watch
Out!
An' one time a little girl 'ud allus laugh an' grin,
An' make fun of ever' one, an' all her blood-an'-kin;
An' onc't when they was "company," an' ole folks was there,
She mocked 'em an' shocked 'em, an' said she didn't care!
An' thist as she kicked her heels, an' turn't to run an' hide,
They was two great big Black Things a-standin' by her side,
An' they snatched her through the ceilin' 'fore she knowed what
she's about!
An' the Gobble-uns'll git you
Ef you
Don't
Watch
Out!
An' little Orphant Annie says, when the blaze is blue,
An' the lampwick sputters, an' the wind goes woo-oo!
An' you hear the crickets quit, an' the moon is gray,
An' the lightnin'-bugs in dew is all squenched away,--
You better mind yer parents, and yer teachers fond and dear,
An' churish them 'at loves you, an' dry the orphant's tear,
An' he'p the pore an' needy ones 'at clusters all about,
Er the Gobble-uns'll git you
Ef you
Don't
Watch
Out!
HANS BREITMANN'S PARTY
BY CHARLES GODFREY LELAND
Hans Breitmann gife a barty,
Dey had biano-blayin;
I felled in lofe mit a Merican frau,
Her name vas Madilda Yane.
Pages:
33
34
35
36
37
38
39
40
41
42
43
44
45
46
47
48
49
50
51
52
53
54
55
56
57