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Various

"The Wit and Humor of America, Volume III. (of X.)"

The old fellow winced, as he nearly always did when she
gave him a direct look.
"Are you all well?" Gideon asked, lifting the tails of his long coat and
seating himself in a rocking chair.
"First-rate," the Major answered, drawing forward another rocker; and
when he had sat down, he added: "Somewhat of an essence of November in
the air."
"Yes," Gid assented; "felt it in my joints before I got up this
morning." From his pocket he took a plug of tobacco.
"I thought you'd given up chewing," said the Major. "Last time I saw you
I understood you to say that you had thrown your tobacco away."
"I did, John; but, I gad, I watched pretty close where I threw it.
Fellow over here gave me some stuff that he said would cure me of the
appetite, and I took it until I was afraid it would, and then threw it
away. I find that when a man quits tobacco he hasn't anything to look
forward to. I quit for three days once, and on the third day, about the
time I got up from the dinner table, I asked myself: 'Well, now, got
anything to come next?' And all I could see before me was hours of
hankering; and, I gad, I slapped a negro boy on a horse and told him to
gallop over to the store and fetch me a hunk of tobacco. And after I
broke my resolution I thought I'd have a fit there in the yard waiting
for that boy to come back.


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